Archive for the ‘Desire’ Tag

One Last Time

He walked up to the table and sat, visibly uncomfortable.
Obviously so. It had been close to eight months.
He still remembered every minute detail of the day he had chosen to walk away.
Walk away from the only one who had given him unquestioned love.

He did not, could not explain why he had done it.
He knew he was guilty. And he was finding it impossible to forgive himself.

It was his attraction, his initiation, his decision.
And he had no right to leave her without a reason.
She was more than love. She had become an addiction”, he tried to convince himself.

And he had always been warned against crossing the line.
But wasn’t that what he was about to do, again.

It’d be the last time, he promised himself.
After all, he owed her an apology. An honest apology. Face to face.
He didn’t know how she would react. But he didn’t care today.
He was being selfish, again.

He knew where he would find her, and started walking at a brisk pace.
The chill in the air rushing to the fore memories of the past days.

Restless, he reached there. And saw her sitting at her favorite corner.
Her first sight, and he was overcome by a reassuring sense of warmth.
That’s what she was. Reassurance.
If thoughts could melt you into nothingness, he would be in a liquid state already.
How could he have been so, so daft?

And almost immediately the question sprinted across his mind – “Will she take me back?”.
He knew he had wronged her immensely.
But everyone makes mistakes, right?

Overpowering was the desire to have her back in his life.
Guilt is lifelong, isn’t it

As he sat there, next to her and looked her in the eyes, he saw the same affection. Unflinching in acceptance.
Reminding him of all the days she had stood by him. The good times and the bad.
Calmed him down when he was angry. Cheered him up when he was sad.
Nothing had changed, or had it?

He wanted to know. Wanted to know if she had given up on him.
Or still wanted him as badly as he wanted her.
It was eating him.
So he got up and gently held her in his hands. She didn’t react.
He closed his eyes for a moment. And opened. She was still there.
So he brought her even closer to him.
And in that moment, oblivious to the world, touched her with his lips.
And discovered his love for the 60 ml, again.